Why does whatever God is lead me to such inacessable places as (he/it)does?  Why do I always feel so alone?  Who among you will be my friend?  I SWEAR I am not a zealot.  Just lost but with a purpose that needs company.

Learn to meditate life gets so much easierx

I don’t believe in god(s).

God, fate, chance, whatever, it’s all the same to me. Just realize that you are the one person who has the most influence on how your life is lived. Change what you cannot accept and accept what you cannot change. Meditating might help with that indeed.

I feel that we are stuck living in a totally undesirable way.  Life is all there is for us.  It is all that there is.  And we’re doing more than that.  We’re doing all of these things that have nothing to do with living.  It’s cause for a tremendous amount of depression in me.  If only if only if only…What is it that we need from this world?  Surely not anything we have built up for ourselves and yet we are stuck viewing what life might/should be like on our pillars of “happiness”.  I’m not happy living this way.  God is all that was here before and still god lingers.  The sun, the earth, and the moon.  I get so wrapped up in sadness thinking about all of the things we do for no cause other than our own.  I get so wrapped up in thinking just how fucked we are.  I’d like to think that ‘deep’ love can overrule all else but the feeling dissappates through all the selfishness and greed that our society thrives on.  The insanity is not located within us but within our lives.  We are told to give in.  We are told to do what is best for us so we can be happy.  Where is the equality in life?  We’re on a system that makes so many unhappy.  Thinking of what is really happening makes me want to puke.  And how do you suppose the people ‘in the know’ respond to the understanding of our existence?  Is any one human strong enough to stand up and do what is absolutely necessary?  Not I.  I can’t even be sure of what I actually feel.  My whole life I’ve just been conditioned over and over. What is in me that is true and pure?  I feel manipulated and misconstrued at every corner.  The happiness I gain is finding another that knows just how screwed up things really are and care to think about it.  I don’t want to give in to “this”.  The only system of control I want to be in is one ruled by the forces of all.  Not the forces of man.  I don’t want to be a statistic in man’s population control strategy.  How can you not feel wronged when you open your eyes? The only right seems to have vanished long before any of us grew into this world.  And still I feel so trapped and helpless.  There is no answer for our lives just as there is no answer to life. I’m fine not knowing why we are here and whatnot.  I don’t expect those questions to contain answers ever but when it is something that we have done to ourselves….then I want some answers…I want some change but there is not much to be done. 1v7,000,000,000 :/ My answer to your question is hidden in here somehow.

Terrence McKenna’s speeches - Take back your mind! He was one of the greats

cjpience - 08 May 2011 08:24 PM

Terrence McKenna’s speeches - Take back your mind! He was one of the greats

He truly was and I wonder what he’d have to say of the current world state, I think his view about novelty increasing is so true.  His brother Dennis is bringing out a book about their life and travels…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRWdkzjGDpM

and his page for the project…

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1862402066/the-brotherhood-of-the-screaming-abyss

You are all sages to me   Thank you for your replies, and I mean all of you!!!  I’ve stayed away from here lately, sheepishly, thinking “fuck, this was just one more time I let the world and the wine I drank make me speak what I thought was my mind, but really maybe I was just being an idiot.”  Thank you all so much for returning me to what I usually think, that I am NOT crazy and that by reaching out somehow I will find my right and hopefully ultimate way!  Especially to MeThisGuy, I sense we’re in the same stage of palpating the world, I think it would be a lovely time if I ran into you someday and we sat down to chat   Earthiness, smoke, and Bacchanalian drink are my aids tonight.  I’m trying to put something worth reading on paper, for the fun and if I’m a lucky person the gain of it.  Not that I’m obsessed with money, but a clean slate would do almost anybody a world of good, I’d guess…  Love to you all   Hope some of you are on tonight!

p.s. yes, meditation is on my list of goals, I am pensive and/or reflective most of the time, but was recently trying to research tried and true methods of getting there, most interested in I think it was maybe tantric meditation, or something along the psychic kind of line… thank you, I gotta get back to that now